“Happy birthday. Or not”

Dear Friend,

For a writer, I probably shouldn’t have been so moved by words. But I was. Maybe it was because of down in the dumps I already was, or perhaps because I felt so sad that I didn’t think anything would lighten my mood that it was that much of a big deal seeing people type out such kind words with factual situations to confirm the actuality of the attributes ascribed to me that moved me.

You may or may not have guessed but it was my birthday sometime this week. Due to some personal issues that I might tell in the long run, my plans for my birthday were ruined. I hit a new decade and for the first time, I did want to have a photoshoot and go out on my birthday. Perhaps if I didn’t have such high expectations I wouldn’t have been disappointed but it was my birthday and I was here sharing regular pictures of myself to those who asked for my pictures and inside my house the whole day replying birthday wishes. I’m a total homebody but I guess that the fact that I didn’t want to be home on that day was what made it annoying to me.

Words do a whole lot. Hurt, heal. Damage, fix. Pull apart, put together. Make sad, make happy. And before the birthday, some words already had me sad. Terribly. It was 11:59 when the first call to wish me a happy birthday came in. She sounded so happy to wish me, said a few sweet things I interrupted because I was leading a prayer meeting at the moment she’d called so she said she’d text me later too which was fine by me. I ended the call and the second connects. “Egbon mi” I had said with a smile that had been brought back to my face from the first call. He had hoped he wished me first but still wished me. I explained the prayer thing to him as well and he hung up to text me instead. His call disconnects and hers connects. My favorite girl after my sister. At this point in time I was already laughing at their silliness to all wish me first. It was sweet, warm and beautiful. Particularly my friends because I had told them about the stuff that had upset me and how I intended to not try to even make myself feel happy because, “What was there to be happy about?” I had wondered.

But there I was, grinning ear to ear like a Cheshire cat by 12:05 on my birthday.

The prayer was scheduled to end 12 am and I was to round off but they had figured something was up with me and rounded off without waiting. Good thing I didn’t have to come back to giving explanations.

I read a couple of messages that came in at that time and I found it crazy how much words could lighten up my mood so easily. I was genuinely happy, emotional and overwhelmed by the love. It had mainly come from my inner circle and a few other friends so it was extremely thoughtful.

To be honest, a few others did get me upset later on during the day but that was what gave me the idea on what to do for my first letter to you.

The power words carry is something we do not know that we shouldn’t undermine, but it is something we shouldn’t.

I have a plethora of things I’d say on words and instances to share. But we have more than enough time here and I wouldn’t want to make this way too lengthy.

But here’s what I’d say to end this. Words wield power. To break a person and to even put them together.

Which would you rather let yours do?

Do leave a reply when you can and you can tell me how your week went.

Sending love and positive feelings,

Love, Precious.

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